We Are

Like a rope that frays and snaps when one holds onto it for too long, 

Like a flame that dies a slow but sure death in an upturned cruse 

We are. 
Like a cloud that is not faithful to a single phasis of the sky, 
Like a butterfly that hop-skips from one capsule of nectar to another 

We are. 
Like the achene of a dandelion’s blowball that is whisked away by the breath of the air, 

Like the ebbing afterglow of an incandescent lamp 

We are. 
Like a moment lost and never to recur, 

Like a stub of charred coal that will never harbor another flicker 

We are. 
Like this ephemera marked by breaths and beats, 

Like a smaller impermanence in a larger impermanence 

We are. 

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Irrational Irony, Inexplicable Indifference & Inevitable Idiosyncrasy : Ingredients of Life

You’re in a crowd, but you’re alone. You explain, but that just makes things harder to understand than they initially were. You speak, but you can’t be heard, or you’re not listened to. When you’re silent, everyone hears. When you’re down, no one wants to help you up, but when you’re up, everyone wants to drag you down. They tell you to hold on when you’re trying to let go. They tell you to let go when you’re trying to hold on. You’re dying while you’re living, and living while you’re dying.

Life is pervaded by the essence of irrational irony.

You talk to a person present in the flesh and you’re ignored. You talk to your “wall” on a social media platform and people who aren’t well-enough acquainted with you connect the dots of your untold emotions. You are forced to wear a smile that conceals the scars lest someone should see them and question your sanity or gloat over your probable insanity. You are forced to line your eyes with kohl to camouflage the deed all the midnight tears have done, because people seem to notice, but won’t seem to understand. You love someone, but your love to them is no more than the earth they trample underfoot.

Life is garnished with the oil of inexplicable indifference.

You are told by people that you will be understood, but ultimately, you end up being either not understood or misunderstood. You are told to stay put by someone who persistently tries to push you off balance when you’re like a feather amidst an air current. You choose your path and traverse it only to realize you’ve been treading the wrong way all this while. You gain something only to realize it won’t last forever, but you lose something and realize that it will be lost forever, like a drop in a boundless ocean.

Life is sprinkled with a dash of inevitable idiosyncrasy.

But life has to go on through it all, doesn’t it? And it does…

You know you’re not losing life’s battle, you’re just fighting your way up from the bottom.

Life is crowned with the indomitable spirit that surmounts the issues so insurmountable.

A Singleton’s Relationship Advice

For relationship advice, many have asked and I have given, but there are some lovestruck ladies who have never offered a penny for my thoughts. Regardless, I’ll give them my thoughts sans counting the cost.

To Her:

Remember the reason he fell in love with you. Give him the same reason and more to fall in love with you over and over again, every single day. If there’s something on your mind, let him hear it from you. If there’s something from your heart that you have to say, make sure it reaches his. You’ll know if heaven ordained him for you if he is that proverbial someone who can understand the sorrow behind your smile and the hurt behind your flawless exterior. Let him know how much you love him, and more importantly why. Remember that although the man, by societal stereotypes is the stronger sex, also has his moments of weakness and insecurity. You might be delicate, but be strong enough for him to lean on when he needs you. Call to mind that you should be as emotionally invested in him as he is in you. You should know he is perfect if he understands your sadness more than your happiness and your tears more than your smile. If he’s the one for you, the inferno of jealousy or insecurity will not consume you if he talks to other girls because you’ll know that his heart is yours and yours alone.

To Him:

Know that you should protect her chastity, not only protect and shield her from your arch rivals. Don’t try to prove to her why other men are unworthy of her. Rather, prove to her why you alone are worthy of her. Treat her with the delicacy her physical structure conveys. Let her know the best and the worst of you to evaluate her true feelings towards you. Never soil the trust she has in you or cause her to look elsewhere to be solaced. Don’t doubt her or put forth a query if she talks to or smiles at other men, because you’ll notice that the sparkle in her eye and the radiance in her cheeks comes into play only when she looks at you. Once you know that you are ready to build a life with her and build your life around her, reassure her that you are invested in her for the long term. Be the rock she has that can never be shaken, the one who lifts her off the ground and from her depressions. Never be tentative to show her the softer, stripped down side of yourself, the dark side every human being has.

And in the end, don’t use, don’t abuse and don’t misuse. Ensure that your hearts are connected as tightly as your fingers are intertwined. While on earth, don’t give each other hell, but catch a glimpse of heaven every single time you look into each other’s eyes.

Fallen From Grace

Being an Indian should evoke an indomitable sense of pride in every citizen, but I dare to say that my every ounce of liking for my native soil has evaporated into thin air. After the devastating desecration of one too many churches, the vandals fueled the fire of rage amongst Christians far and wide.

In my opinion, reacting would be a problem, but acting wisely would be the solution. Words speak louder than actions in this case scenario and this was the response that was elicited from me on a social networking platform:

Dearest Government of ‪‎India‬ (yet again),
The Pledge and the Constitution have been reduced to mere jokes, and I say that seriously. I didn’t think I’d have to write a sophomore stanza expressing my utter shock and dismay over the manner in which our churches are being desecrated and our people are being exploited. It stuns me that this idol-worshipping country maintains cricket stadiums but vandalizes churches, takes major issue over a trivial jibe targeted at a politicians as dirty as the ghetto streets, but remains tight-lipped and indifferent when a religion and its flock are at stake. Are you barbarians, by all these deeds, trying to criminalize our very existence? But know this: you have all fanned the flames of our fury to a fever pitch, yet, we will not avenge. We will not thumb our noses at the founding commandments of our faith that teach us to love and forgive our foes. Our God never retaliated when he was crucified and jeered at. To everyone who has orchestrated or executed such loutish acts, remember that you will have one bloody banquet in Hades waiting for you. You might have broken our churches, but you can never break our Christian spirit.

After all, what would the economic stats, the political ambitions and the education matter when brothers and sisters cannot coexist peacefully in their own home?

As Abandoned as You Can Be

“Hey, I have big news for you!” I say.

Everyone listens.

“Hey, there’s a party in my house this weekend.”

Everyone comes.

“Hey, I have a boyfriend.”

Everyone wants the details.

“I feel so lonely. I need someone.”

No one cares.

What bestial reality!

It must baffle you when you try to make sense of indifference these days. But it’s just natural for people to not want to partake in your sorrow. It’s like giving them a choice between maple syrup and pulverized bitter squash.

Jettisoned as you may be, know that people don’t leave you to show you that you’re weaker without them, but to show you that you’re stronger on your own. Everyone says that his life is packed to the brim with his own sorrows that he hasn’t any room for that of another, but it’s mind-boggling as to how the same hearts that appear to be filled to the brim with sentiments of melancholy are avid partakers in activities and talks of pleasure.

Everyone wants to be with you when your happiness is at its pinnacle but no one really accompanies you down to the vale when you’re overwhelmed with sadness.

But don’t worry, because those who taste pleasure too often will wind up miserable just like those who drink too much of maple syrup might be on the waiting list of Mr. Diabetes. Those who know sorrow will just come closer to what they are and will eventually learn to discover the real meaning of life- not in the form of vague delectation- but in its every sense. Bitter squash might cause a tongue to recoil and a face to squirm, but it doesn’t kill. It just makes you healthier and stronger.

Getting Accustomed to Living with the Past

Every single soul to ever live on and roam this planet has carried that weighty anchor on his back- the past. It rightly serves its purpose of dragging a person down the suffocating ocean of bitter memories when they break more than just a sweat in the attempt to resurface.

Just because one puts the past behind oneself, it doesn’t mean that the past isn’t following one around. It’s always there like an invisible ghost to haunt the mind and resurrect deadened memories.

It is a misconception that one can run away from one’s past. The past is a fragment of one’s life that one can only learn to accept and live with- much like conditioning oneself to living with a person one knows is never going to change.

And if people can never change, the past can never alter itself. It can be likened to an uncensored film with no facilities to format or modify situations, actions or words.

Coming back to the metaphor of the ocean, a skilled swimmer was once someone who sank in the water in his first attempt to float, but as his mind and body became accustomed to the feel and the smell of the chlorinated water, the fear of sinking in it was soon dispelled and now, he is able to glide in a lissom manner across the water without allowing it to suck him in. Instead, he propels his whole form forward, conquering the demanding water with his buoyancy.

At first, the notion of the water would have conjured up in his mind, the ghost of fear, but as he enhances his aquatic prowess, a wave of realization will sweep over him, following which, he would know that it was the fear of sinking in that water that made him want to resurface.

It might have taken time, but in the end, it paid off. The water remained the same, but the boy who went into it like a sinker came out of it a full-fledged swimmer.

Likewise, the past will always remain the same. The person bearing it like a burden can decide whether to succumb to it or whether to overcome it.

Remedies for Healing a Hurt Heart

There is that one feeling that cuts deeper than a razor-sharp scalpel- hurt. Hurt is a consequence of love- love that you gave but never received in the way you hoped to. There are ways of coping with the pain inflicted by love. These are my self-discovered therapeutic remedies to refrain from imploding or exploding, or in extreme cases, both…

  • Let your mouth speak for your heart

If talking to someone aids you to express your love, it will also serve you well to express your hurt. No matter how deranged this may sound, talking to yourself or an inanimate object is also remedial. But if you’re bent on speaking to a mortal in the flesh, select that person with as much care and caution you would reinforce while selecting your wedding gown. Never seek sympathy, rather, seek counsel, warmth and understanding.

  • Let your eyes water and be your own comforter

Crying is a means of purging oneself of the debris of accumulated hurt. Doing it in solitude is most preferential to me because when I’m hurt, I feel like I am my own comforter and that my own heart understands the reason behind my tears better than anyone else would. Somewhere I read that “clouds burst when they can’t withhold their contents any longer, and so it is with us.”

  • Allow time to be your doctor

Just like a physical wound requires time and treatment to heal, so does an emotional one. Never pick at a scar that has closed after much ado. But remember that time doesn’t relieve you of the weight you are bearing. It just accustoms you to carrying it.

  • Learn to accept

Once Doctor Time has accomplished his job, you will be in the phase of accepting your altered state of emotional affairs. Never expect to be skyrocketed to Planet Euphoria in no time. Recovering from the sting of heartbreak is equable with recovering from a malady. Remember that your heart might still be fragile and vulnerable, so do not dive headfirst (or heart-first without using your head) into the pool of pleasure because you aren’t going to know whether it will suck you in and spit you out in a mortifying condition or cause you to hit the solid bottom. Accept what has been and hope in what is yet to be.

  • Move ahead and move on

Never let the past remind you that you were weak and broken. Rather, let it be a reminder that you fought that interior battle and have emerged triumphantly. The past is irreversible and unchangeable, so leave it be. Let the past follow you, but let the present live in you as you live in it, and let the future lead you. Move ahead and move on. Hurt can last only as long as you allow it to.